With have within each of us the power not only to change but transform, into the kind of person we want to be, living the kind of existence we want to live. I have already explained the first and most important step – to simply acknowledge and accept that your life is not what you want it to be and that change is needed and necessary. Even if you accept that your life is undesirable or unmanageable and that change is needed and necessary, it is the follow through that can seem most difficult. Many may feel that they can’t change and will stop here, never moving beyond this point.
But, the second step is also fundamentally important when seeking a transformation. You must feel or know that you have the power to change yourself. There are many reasons some may feel they can not change. Some may cede their power to another or to something else and feel that they can’t change because this thing or this other person won’t let them change. If this sounds like you then you must realize that you have had the power all along. If you gave it away in the first place then you were in control to begin with. If you gave it away then you can take it back.
Some are loath to feel that they can change because of just what very little healthy achievement and lack of personal enrichment can do to a person over time. It numbs the mind, destroys the spirit and steals away hope. This may describe you if you hear yourself saying “I can’t” too often. If you try at something, yes you will fail at times and at other times you will succeed. If you say you can’t all of the time then you will be right 100% of the time. There is no easier way to succeed at failing than never to try.
People are meant to accomplish, to build, to travel, to learn, to teach, to love, to innovate, to design, to create, to experience with our the six senses. Yes, I said six. The mind is your sixth sense. It is the portal to the other senses and the seat of understanding. You must come to understand that you have within yourself the power to do all of those things. It is but a choice.
When I ask people why they don’t choose to embark on a journey of self-discovery and seek the change they so desire, many will give me an odd look as if the choice wasn’t theirs to make. Others will recite a litany of obstacles that they perceive prevents them from changing their lives for the better. When in actuality the only real obstacle in their way is their mind-set. Before you can change, before you can transform, you must adopt a Transformation Mind-Set. It is a very different way of thinking, one which may be completely foreign to you at first.
A Transformation Mind-Set will, as much and as often as possible, trade “I can’t” for “I can” or for some version of that. For example, if you spoke no foreign language and someone were to ask you, “Do you speak a second language?” Your first inclination might be, “No, I don’t.” A transformed mind would rather say, “I can! I just haven’t learned one yet.”
You must come to feel or to know that you have the power to change you. Do you feel that way about yourself? Do you feel that you have the ability to change, to learn, to grow, to become a different person? If so, please return for Part IV in this series on the next step toward Transformation.